Orlando Magic Can't Afford to Keep Keyon Dooling; World Mourns

The dominoes keep falling into place for the Magic. Tuesday, they agreed to terms with free-agent guard Mickael Pietrus; Wednesday, they decided they would not re-sign Keyon Dooling, according to the Orlando Sentinel's sources. Essentially, team made a marginal upgrade at its weakest position, only to make a significant downgrade at its second-weakest position one day later. At best, they've broken even. Dooling is, without a doubt, the best point guard left on the market. The best the Magic could hope for now is -- gulp -- over-the-hill Jason Williams, who just happens to be interested in signing here, also according to the Sentinel.

Whoop-de-freakin'-do.

The only thing keeping me sane right now is the knowledge that this team won 52 games last season. No need to panic, is there? I mean, it's not like other Eastern teams are making moves to get better. HAHAHAHAA!

Shoot me in the head.

Best of luck to you, Keyon, wherever you go. And I'm sorry you had to hear about the Pietrus signing while on vacationing with Jameer Nelson and Tony Battie in the Bahamas. That must have been... awkward...

Maybe the team will get a solid contributor in return for J.J. Redick, who seems to have accepted that he's finished here; for what it's worth, Otis Smith thinks differently. The Nile is not only a river in Egypt, friends.

What a miserable day.

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