Okay, I really wanted to have this post up much sooner, but an HTML goof-up set me back a few hours; tables are complicated things. So, rather than lay everything out in a table, I'll try a list.

Honestly, last night's loss has left a sour taste in my mouth, and I'm tempted just to post this picture as the season evaluation and get on with it:

"You all FAIL!"

Here the players are, listed in alphabetical order. The team as a hole is at the end of the list. Offense and defense count 40% each, and intangibles counts 20%. Please file any grievances in the comments. Or, if you wish, post a rebuttal in the diaries.

• Carlos Arroyo:
  • OFFENSE: B+
  • DEFENSE: C-
  • INTANGIBLES: B+
  • OVERALL: B-
  • COMMENTS: Great as a starter (12.4 points, .574 shooting), not-so-great as a reserve (5.2 points, .387 shooting). Love his efficiency, though: he's 10th in the league in assists per turnover.
• James Augustine:
  • OFFENSE: C+
  • DEFENSE: C+
  • INTANGIBLES: A
  • OVERALL: B-
  • COMMENTS: Has limited skills, but makes the most of his playing time with hustle, energy. Might benefit from some time in the D-League.
• Tony Battie:
  • OFFENSE: I
  • DEFENSE: I
  • INTANGIBLES: I
  • OVERALL: I
  • COMMENTS:Out for the season after rotator-cuff surgery. Notable: filled-in for Richie Adubato as the Magic's radio color commentator when Adubato was at a family function.
• Keith Bogans:
  • OFFENSE: B
  • DEFENSE: B
  • INTANGIBLES: B
  • OVERALL: B
  • COMMENTS: Defense good, as usual. Shooting a career-best .424 from the field. Surprising, but still not great.
• Brian Cook:
  • OFFENSE: D
  • DEFENSE: F
  • INTANGIBLES: C
  • OVERALL: F
  • COMMENTS: Shoots horribly and is a complete non-factor on defense. His outburst against the Bulls was welcome, though.
• Keyon Dooling:
  • OFFENSE: B+
  • DEFENSE: B
  • INTANGIBLES: A
  • OVERALL: B+
  • COMMENTS: Aggressive on offense and on defense, and has a great attitude. Sometimes it looks like he's the only player who cares about winning and losing.
• Maurice Evans:
  • OFFENSE: B
  • DEFENSE: B
  • INTANGIBLES: A
  • OVERALL: B
  • COMMENTS: He and Bogans are basically the same player. His 3s almost make the Ariza trade worth it. Likable, but not the long-term answer as the Magic's starting two-guard.
• Adonal Foyle:
  • OFFENSE: D+
  • DEFENSE: B
  • INTANGIBLES: A
  • OVERALL: B
  • COMMENTS: Horrible on offense -- I've never seen a guy with worse touch around the basket -- but that's not what he's here for. His defense and leadership make him worth having here. I truly appreciate his effort.
• Pat Garrity:
  • OFFENSE: D-
  • DEFENSE: D
  • INTANGIBLES: A
  • OVERALL: D
  • COMMENTS: His career should have ended a long time ago. He's good in the community, though. That's about all I've got, folks.
• Marcin Gortat:
  • OFFENSE: I
  • DEFENSE: I
  • INTANGIBLES: I
  • OVERALL: I
  • COMMENTS: Rookie still hasn't gotten any burn and is usually on the inactive list anyway. Not likely to play at all this year. With any luck, he'll crack the rotation next season.  
• Dwight Howard:
  • OFFENSE: A
  • DEFENSE: B+
  • INTANGIBLES: C
  • OVERALL: I
  • COMMENTS: Won't get an "A" overall until he stops whining after every call or non-call that goes against him. Arguably the game's best center.  
• Rashard Lewis:
  • OFFENSE: B+
  • DEFENSE: C
  • INTANGIBLES: B-
  • OVERALL: B-
  • COMMENTS: Scoring is down, but he opens up the middle for Dwight. Needs to stop wishing he was on other teams -- why does he still have the Rockets jersey with his name on it Houston gave him this summer? Why did he say he would have accepted a $100 million contract to stay with Seattle? Disconcerting.  
• Jameer Nelson:
  • OFFENSE: B
  • DEFENSE: C
  • INTANGIBLES: A
  • OVERALL: B-
  • COMMENTS: Not living up to expectations, but not a total disaster, either. Needs to prove he's starter material, and soon; nobody wants to pay $35 million for a backup.  
• J.J. Redick:
  • OFFENSE: B+
  • DEFENSE: D
  • INTANGIBLES: C+
  • OVERALL: C
  • COMMENTS: Love his willingness to shoot, although he pump-fakes too much. Needs to stop fouling jump-shooters. Note that his numbers off the bench (3.5 points, .458 FG%) are worse than Bogans' off the bench (8 points, .531 FG%).
• Hedo Turkoglu:
  • OFFENSE: A
  • DEFENSE: B-
  • INTANGIBLES: B+
  • OVERALL: B
  • COMMENTS: The team's most reliable crunch-time scorer is having a career-best year. Wish he would play better defense, though.
• ORLANDO MAGIC:
  • OFFENSE: B-
  • DEFENSE: C-
  • INTANGIBLES: B-
  • OVERALL: B-
  • COMMENTS: Team needs to shoot better from three-point range if it's going to continue taking 25 treys a game. The way they're playing right now, it's hard to believe this team was once a top-3 defense early this season.
  
  

Brian Schmitz posted his evaluations today over at the Sentinel's website.  And for an outsider's perspective, Steve Weinman offers his in-depth look at the Magic over at CelticsBlog.